When Was Your Last “Oh No, What Have I Done?” Moment”
And Why We Need To Have These Moments.
One of my more recent memorable “Oh No, What I have I Done?” moments was a few years ago. This follows on from my previous article about adventurous around the world travel.
Life circumstances had led me to the idea of travelling in a way I had never done before. Packing up my life and taking off with just a backpack around the world for twelve months. No plans. It was to be “My Senior Gap Year”. To just take each day as it came. How exciting I thought.
But guess what? My plans became more and more sabotaged as each day passed. Worse, it was me who was stopping me from going. I came up with what seemed like a hundred reasons not to go. I was too old. What if I got sick. Going for twelve months. Leaving all my family and friends. On my own. I would be so lonely. I became my worst enemy. I was the one who had now set out to make sure I killed this crazy idea. My fears had taken over my dream.
Fortunately, after many months of listening and learning to understand my fears, I eventually, as if I turned to the voice inside my head, said, enough, enough, we’re going. If I hadn’t, as I later discovered, I would have missed out on an amazing life changing experience.
Some people describe addressing our fears like peeling back each layer of an onion. As we peel back each layer, it may have us shed a tear as we listen to the concerns our inner voice wants to tell us. Each layer will show us reasons why we should stay as we are, to stay safe, familiar and comfortable. But as we peel back each layer, listen to what it’s saying. Don’t ignore the chatter, it is simply trying to keep us safe. Answer the “what if” concerns, then peel back the next layer and keep peeling back until you feel you can take action.
And deep down beyond all the noisy chatter in our head, we will then often find another inner dialogue to listen to — the pull of our heart. It’s probably been trying to speak to us over many years. And over the years we have added layer after layer after layer of reasons not to go.
Remember how you feel when you finally face up to your fears and made a major decision. It’s like a burden has been lifted. All your energy can then shift from wrestling with the decision to now focusing on moving forward. It’s an exciting time as you prepare for the adventure ahead.
But beware, it’s when the rubber hits the road, when you start implementing your decision, your fears will often be waiting for you around the corner.
It happened to me on this adventure. I had just arrived in Spain, the first stop in my twelve-month adventure. I spoke no Spanish. I knew no one. I had booked no accommodation — after all this was the adventure I wanted. But things weren’t falling into place as I had expected. I could find no suitable accommodation. So much looked dodgy a bit scary and lonely. I was seriously starting to regret the decision I made. Moving on looked like the best option. After all, people said I would be back after just a few months. But this was only a couple weeks. Maybe they were right after all.
This was my “Oh No, What Have I Done?” moment. But deep down, I knew if I stuck with it, it would work out. And true to that it did. Things did fall into place. It became the start of one of the most memorable and fulfilling life experiences, more than I had dreamt of.
I have since reflected on many such past “Oh No, What Have I Done?” moments. I don’t think there’s one that hadn’t transformed into experiences far greater than imagined.
It’s sooooo easy, so comfortable to stay in our comfort zone. It’s so easy to dream. But it’s when we face up to our fears and doubts, then work through our “Oh No, What I have I Done?” moment, is when we allow ourselves to truly grow from a positive life changing experience that awaits us.
Chris
May 2022
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This article is part of a series on how to travel the world as an independent, adventurous traveler.
